100 things I'm grateful for

I've been working on this list for several months, off and on. It seems my life is pretty awesome. I don't mean to brag; I just hope my list makes you a little more grateful for the blessings in your life.

1. I have friends who care about me.
2. God listens when I pray.
3. God put me here on this earth to learn and gave His Son to get me back.
4. I get to learn daily about how the world works.
5. I am healthy and strong.
6. I've been blessed with an acute intellect.
7. There is beautiful music.
8. Nature is beautiful.
9. Nature provides never-ending opportunities to study.
10. I get second chances. And thirty-fifth chances.
11. There are magnificently powerful tools to help me accomplish almost anything.
12. There are holy temples all over the world and I get to attend them frequently.
13. Even the people I don't know are usually really nice to me.
14. There is lots of freely and reasonably priced art available in lots of forms.
15. I have a good singing voice.
16. There are more good books to read than I could possibly digest in a lifetime.
17. God guides me. He knows what He's doing, even though I don't.
18. My body heals itself.
19. Not everyone is the same as I am, which makes life interesting.
20. I have a stable family.
21. I was raised in a home where education is valued.
22. My basic needs have always been met.
23. I was able to become financially independent while still in college.
24. I basically never had to pay tuition.
25. For almost every topic, I have a friend who is knowledgeable about it.
26. There are libraries.
27. The internet allows me to access information quickly.
28. I can communicate instantaneously with people all over the world.
29. There have been and are prophets and their teachings are invaluable.
30. The prophets also provide good (but human) examples.
31. My friends know my quirks and shortcomings and still want to be my friends.
32. I have friends who are willing to call me out when I'm wrong.
33. I have friends who can see qualities in me that I can't see.
34. People teach me the lessons they've spent a lifetime learning.
35. My mission changed me forever.
36. I have frequent opportunities to serve others.
37. I'm capable of growing a beard.
38. I have enough flexibility to take a nap when I need one.
39. Hot showers during cold winters.
40. Worlds don't end when I err, which is a luxury not afforded to movie characters.
41. My ex-girlfriends aren't ex-friends.
42. People do so much good that I see it even when I'm not looking for it.
43. My car works and even looks pretty good.
44. I'm not dead, despite the many times I've been in serious danger.
45. Thanks to freezers, I can enjoy basically any food at any time.
46. I know stuff about nutrition.
47. I look pretty good bald.
48. Dancing is fun and I'm good at it.
49. People's parents seem to like me.
50. People can change - myself included.
51. Someday, I get to have a family.
52. The chant "You're either with Petey or against America!"
53. I've had lots of opportunities to benefit from the wisdom of generations past.
54. Little children have a knack for believing and seeing the best. It's inspiring.
55. I get to live in a place where there's room to spread out and breathe.
56. My mother taught me how to cook.
57. My mother taught me manners.
58. My father taught me to always do what's right, regardless of circumstance.
59. In-laws: they're sudden extensions to the family.
60. I've never had to fight to defend myself and likely won't have to.
61. I live in a culture where most people deal effectively with bodily odors.
62. I get ample reminders to do good things and improve.
63. I get ample reminders that I'm actually a decent guy.
64. Summertime.
65. I've always had a ward, so I've always had friends.
66. It's okay to take a break when I need one; there's always more time.
67. Beyond my necessities, I enjoy several luxuries.
68. I can type. It's fast, accurate, and otherwise less annoying than writing.
69. I get divine help when I need it, even for mundane tasks.
70. There are many good examples of familial happiness and stability.
71. My whole life is perfectly designed to teach me what I need to progress.
72. Winter is beautiful.
73. The sun always comes back.
74. The vast majority of the bad things that could happen don't happen.
75. Exercise works. It's possible to do hard things and not be sore later.
76. Nerd skills come in handy.
77. Affordable gamma lids.
78. Poetry beautiful enough to get my attention.
79. I live in a time where violence is discouraged rather than encouraged.
80. The ability to learn from my mistakes.
81. Writing allows me to express myself and to think through my problems.
82. Different cultures capture different truths. We get to learn from them.
83. It's fun to learn languages and doing so changes how I see the world.
84. My failures and disappointments have made me better.
85. Every once in a while, I hit a string of green lights.
86. People I haven't seen in years are happy to see me again.
87. Deciduous forests.
88. Mountain lakes.
89. I sometimes get feelings of surpassing wonder. They're never predictable.
90. My vivid imagination makes my life incredibly rich.
91. Hoods and hats go a long way towards keeping my bald head warm.
92. There's a reason to laugh every day. Often, there are several.
93. My great sense of smell is coupled with a strong resistance to revulsion.
94. When there aren't great people to spend time with, there are good books.
95. Most of the things I need to do become interesting if they aren't already.
96. Sometimes I do something and am met with a shocking degree of success.
97. People often value my opinion.
98. There is always something new to boggle my mind.
99. I've had uncounted wonderful experiences and I know many more are coming.
100. As terrific as this life is, there's something much better waiting.

Update: Fixed a typo in #71. Life teaches me things. It does not reach me things.

The times they are a-changin'

It's autumn in Utah. For weeks, I've been observing the colors as I've hiked, commuted, and lived. The colors are beginning to become muted and drab and will soon become wintry. The snows will come and most of the world's hue will be lost for a while.

Several of my favorite songs seem particularly appropriate for the season, so I made a few minutes to make a playlist for each of the seasons. I was surprised to find that the process of creating these playlists was a deeply introspective one. I now understand my own feelings towards the seasons better than ever before. I've included my playlists at the bottom, in case you're interested in seeing them.

When I think about life, I think of summer. I don't mean that things grow in the summer or that there's more greenery (although there is). I mean that, in my mind, summer is normal and the other seasons are the exception to the rule. Summertime is characterized by music that is upbeat and energetic. A lot of my upbeat dance music ended up in this playlist. Love stories in this playlist seem to be going well – or, at least, there are good prospects. My summer playlist is the longest of them, perhaps because I love summer so much. Or maybe it's because I love dancing.

In autumn, the world changes. Green turns to red and yellow. Heat fades. Clear skies become cloudy and it begins to rain. The music of autumn is reflective. It recognizes that not every good thing lasts. Some of the more acute breakup songs are in autumn, but so are some hopeful songs about change. There is brightness and color in the music, but the energy of summer is mostly gone.

Then the world fades into whites and browns. The sun hides and so do the people. For months, it seems as if there is no life or hope anywhere. There is nothing abrupt about winter, so it doesn't have sharp pains; instead, it has chronic ones. It is a time of longing for what was and wondering what might have been. There is hope for what might be, but it is marred by uncertainty about when or if the change will come. Although most of my dance music was in the summer playlist, there are several waltzes that found their way to my winter list.

Eventually, every winter begins to end when spring comes. The sun peeks cautiously from behind the clouds. The clouds are used to ruling the skies and fight back vehemently. Their efforts ultimately fail and, as the sun reasserts its preeminence, it brings new life to the world. Spring is a time of transition. There are somber days and setbacks, but there is always progress. Once spring begins, summer is no longer a distant, desperate hope but a certainty. The buds and leaves on every tree serve as constant reminders of what is to come. The music of spring is about new things, especially about new love and the hope that a budding love will mature into a deep, dependable one.

I'm not sure if I'm really being fair to some of the seasons. Actually, I'm more okay with winter than I ever have been before (yes, my feelings used to be stronger about it). But I tolerate winter at best. Maybe I'll be able to mature to the point that I can actually appreciate all of the seasons as they are.

Summer

• The Archies - Sugar, Sugar
• The Beatles - Golden Slumbers
• Bob Marley - Three Little Birds
• Boys Like Girls - Thunder
• Carl Douglas - Kung Fu Fighting
• Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe
• Cupid - Cupid Shuffle
• Collective Soul - Heavy
• Daniel Bedingfield - Girlfriend
• Queen & David Bowie - Under Pressure
• Don Henley - The Boys Of Summer
• Duke Ellington And His Famous Orchestra - It Don't Mean A Thing (If It Ain't Got That Swing) (1999 Remastered)
• Duran Duran - Hungry Like The Wolf
• Eagles - Hotel California
• Louis Armstrong - Summertime
• Ellie Goulding - Lights
• Green Day - Oh Love
• Herman's Hermits - I'm Henry The VIII
• Herman's Hermits - Silhouettes
• Imagine Dragons - It's Time
• Iyaz - Replay (Album Version)
• Jimmy Eat World - Sweetness
• Justin Bieber - Baby
• Kansas - Carry On Wayward Son
• Katrina & The Waves - Walking On Sunshine
• Kate Voegele - Only Fooling Myself
• Led Zeppelin - Fool In The Rain
• Louis Armstrong - Hello Dolly
• Loverboy - Working For The Weekend
• The Lovin' Spoonful - Summer In The City (2003 Remaster)
• Michael Jackson - Beat It
• Michael Jackson - Bad
• Miley Cyrus - Party In The U.S.A.
• Miley Cyrus - Hoedown Throwdown
• Natasha Bedingfield featuring Sean Kingston - Love Like This
• Owl City - Alligator Sky (No Rap Version)
• Owl City - Air Traffic
• Owl City - Deer In The Headlights
• Owl City - Fireflies
• Owl City - Good Time (Feat. Owl City and Carly Rae Jepsen)
• OneRepublic - Stop And Stare
• Owl City - Hello Seattle
• Owl City - On The Wing
• Prince - When Doves Cry
• Paul Simon - You Can Call Me Al
• Paul Simon with Los Lobos - All Around The World Or The Myth Of Fingerprints
• Phil Collins - True Colors
• Phil Collins - Dance Into The Light
• Rick Astley - Never Gonna Give You Up
• La Roux - Bulletproof
• Sam Cooke - Another Saturday Night
• Savage Garden - The Animal Song (Album Version)
• Simon & Garfunkel - The Sound of Silence
• Starship - We Built This City
• Stevie Nicks - Edge of Seventeen
• Sting - Desert Rose
• Taylor Swift - Long Live
• Taylor Swift - You Belong With Me
• U2 - Pride (In The Name Of Love)
• War - Low Rider
• Weather Report - Birdland
• Weezer - My Name Is Jonas

Autumn

• Sting - Fields Of Gold
• 3 Doors Down - Away From The Sun
• Annie Lennox - Into The West
• Collective Soul - Run
• The Dave Brubeck Quartet - Take Five
• Don McLean - American Pie
• Earth, Wind & Fire - September
• Fergie - Big Girls Don't Cry (Personal)
• Fleetwood Mac - Landslide
• Gladys Knight & The Pips - Midnight Train To Georgia
• Jimmy Eat World - Hear You Me
• Led Zeppelin - Ramble On
• Kate Voegele - Chicago
• Nelly - Just A Dream
• Oasis - Champagne Supernova
• Oasis - Wonderwall
• Timbaland/OneRepublic - Apologize
• Owl City - Meteor Shower
• Owl City - Vanilla Twilight
• Sarah McLachlan with Bryan Adams - Don't Let Go (with Bryan Adams)
• Savage Garden - Hold Me (Album Version)
• Seether feat. Amy Lee - Broken
• Simon & Garfunkel - April Come She Will
• Simon & Garfunkel - Leaves That Are Green
• Stereo Fuse - Everything
• Taylor Swift - The Best Day
• Taylor Swift - White Horse
• TLC - Creep
• The Tony Rich Project - Nobody Knows
• Train - Hopeless
• The Verve Pipe - The Freshmen
• The Weepies - World Spins Madly On

Winter

• The Beatles - The Fool on the Hill [from the Film "Magical Mystery Tour"]
• Billy Joel - And So It Goes
• Ella Fitzgerald - Dream A Little Dream Of Me
• Evanescence - My Immortal (Band Version)
• Jimmy Eat World - My Sundown
• Josh Groban - February Song (Album Version)
• Josh Groban - So She Dances (Album Version)
• Josh Groban - Remember When It Rained
• Kate Voegele - Kindly Unspoken
• Lighthouse Family - Ain't No Sunshine
• Lifehouse - Simon
• Owl City - January 28, 1986
• Phil Collins - One More Night
• Sarah McLachlan - Answer
• Simon & Garfunkel - Bookends Theme
• Taylor Swift - Back To December
• Sting - Shape Of My Heart
• Taylor Swift - Last Kiss
• Simon & Garfunkel - I Am a Rock

Spring

• Annie Lennox - Walking On Broken Glass
• Antonio Carlos Jobim - Garota de Ipanema
• Antonio Carlos Jobim - Samba de Uma Nota So
• Association - Windy
• Starship - Sara
• The Beatles - Here Comes the Sun
• Billy Joel - The Longest Time
• Coldplay - Paradise
• Daniel Bedingfield - Without the Girl
• Ella Fitzgerald - Let's Call The Whole Thing Off
• Ella Fitzgerald - They Can't Take That Away From Me
• Jesse McCartney - Beautiful Soul
• Louis Armstrong - What A Wonderful World
• The Lovin' Spoonful - Do You Believe In Magic?
• Mandy Moore - Crush
• Mandy Moore - Cry
• Marc Cohn - Walking In Memphis (LP Version)
• Miley Cyrus - The Climb
• Miles Davis - So What
• Norah Jones - Come Away With Me
• Owl City - Honey And The Bee
• Owl City - Hospital Flowers
• Owl City - The Real World
• Owl City - The Saltwater Room
• Paul Simon - Under African Skies
• Savage Garden - Crash And Burn (Album Version)
• Seal - Kiss From A Rose
• Seal - Love's Divine (Album Version)
• Simon & Garfunkel - Scarborough Fair/Canticle
• Sixpence None The Richer - Kiss Me
• Starship - Sara
• Taylor Swift - Fearless
• Taylor Swift - Today Was A Fairytale
• Train - Drops Of Jupiter
• U2 - I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

Making happiness in the lab

I spent a month in the summer of 2006 working in Kent Pinkerton's lab in the Center for Health and the Environment at UC Davis. The students and postdocs in the lab who worked with Kent were intelligent, articulate, and kind. They supported each other and helped me considerably. Despite feeling underqualified, I felt welcome with all of my colleagues (although I feel that I'm arrogating myself to call them that).

It didn't take long for me to realize that Kent's influence over the lab was considerable. He was respected for being very capable in his work, but he was loved for being a kind tutor. He communicated effectively and did an admirable job of helping people feel good about themselves. Before my month in his lab was over, I found myself observing him to learn what I could about the art of building others up. I've practiced what I learned over the years and, although I don't claim to be a master of this art, my ability to build others has improved greatly.

With this post, I hope to simultaneously thank Kent for this significant contribution to my life and to pass on some of what I've learned about this important skill.

I think that the first thing I noticed about Kent is that he's sincere. It's simply impossible to not believe him, even when he says incredible things. I still remember meeting with him at the end of my time in his lab. I'd done some simple analyses of some slides and remember that he exclaimed, "You were worth every penny!" I certainly hadn't thought I was worth every penny; I actually had thought of myself as something of a charity case. But the way he said it made it impossible for me to disbelieve him. Sincerity was not a new idea to me, as I'd been taught to be sincere all my life – but Kent's sincerity was so apparent that I was able to see why it mattered.

As I attended lab meetings and watched Kent doing research with the others, I also realized that he was very specific in his compliments. He would isolate exactly what someone had done or a characteristic that someone had and talk about it. Specificity matters because it communicates sincerity and because it doesn't sound like a platitude. I blame my egocentricity for the fact that I don't remember any specific compliments that Kent gave to others in the lab, but I do remember that he told me that, "We'll make a scientist out of you yet." At the time, I was planning to become an electrical engineer and Kent recognized specific aptitudes and abilities that would make me valuable in research. Without this comment, made in passing, I may never have considered a career in research.

The two compliments I've mentioned were effective because I could tell that Kent really cared. It wasn't that he cared about me (although I have no doubt he did and does), but that I could tell that the things he talked about really mattered to him. His enthusiasm made compliments that would have been nice into great compliments. The first compliment showed his enthusiasm for good evidence to inform the community. From the second compliment, I inferred that Kent values his field and wants it to do well – and that he wanted me to be a part of it because he saw that I could contribute.

I appreciated his comments particularly because they addressed insecurities of mine – things that kept me up at night. At the time, I was not at all confident that I was worth the hassle and the pay that I'd cost the lab. And I wasn't confident that my abilities were up to par. Such emphatic, unsolicited validation eased the burdens that I'd been trying to carry without addressing them externally.

It is crucial to note that these compliments described essential, not superficial, characteristics. They complimented who I really am on the inside and not something ancillary to my character, such as my appearance or a first impression of me. Addressing people's identity raises the stakes; the insults that sting the most and the compliments that provide the largest preponderance of warm, fuzzy feelings are the ones that describe the soul.

Of course, my listed generalities only help so much. It can be difficult to find useful and effective compliments for other people, especially on demand. Over the years, I've discovered that a few habits have greatly improved my ability to give compliments.

I've learned to observe people carefully. I'm not content to know what people are doing because understanding why they do what they do gives important insight into who they are. It helps to never assume that I've achieved my goal of understanding people. They are infinitely complex, which makes them interesting and which gives me cause to keep observing. Of course, passive observation has its limits. I have found it useful to combine careful observation with good questions.

I've also learned to believe the best of people. It's easy to assume that people do what they do because of some character flaw or other, but I've found that there is a deeper understanding to be had of virtually every person's motivation for any action. Assuming the best allows me to stop judging and to keep looking for others' good qualities. As I do so, I'm able to see specific characteristics of other people that I wouldn't see were I judging them.

Perhaps the most important thing that I have learned to do to build people up is to care about them. When I care about people, it shows. They respond with trust, which allows me to understand them better and therefore to build them up more effectively. As I have chosen to serve others, especially those to whom I'm not naturally drawn, I've found it easier to love them. This increased love has enabled me to build them up as I could not do previously.

One of the principal joys in life is sharing a sincere smile with someone else. Giving good compliments makes me happy because it makes my friends happy. I hope it does the same for you.

A rock feels no pain

I recently experienced a significant disappointment. It didn't come as a surprise but it wasn't really what I wanted, either. Since that experience, I've paid careful attention to my emotions and have been surprised at how gentle they've been. I feel fine. I'm not sure that I ought to feel fine, though, and I've been wondering if there's something wrong with me and my emotions.

I'm sure it will come as no surprise to my friends that I took a while to question what the ideal of emotional experience is, what my current experience with it is, what difference exists between them, and what I can do to close the gap. I had an interesting thought yesterday: what price would I pay to experience more emotion?

This question probably deserves some background. As I've discussed previously, I decided long ago that anger would not be a part of my life. Since then, I've chosen to avoid acting on feelings of anger and have learned to process those feelings. I've learned to give others the benefit of the doubt and to be patient. Years later, I sometimes experience frustration and occasionally indignation but anger really isn't a part of my life. When I do experience a feeling like anger, I'm able to arrest its development, remove myself from the situation, and deal with it on my own without expressing it at anyone else. I've cultivated this control carefully over the years. I've considered it to be a part of the ideal that I call emotional maturity for some time. My conception of this ideal, in summary, has been that a person ought to use reason and emotion together to make decisions without allowing either one to dominate the other. Anger should be avoided because it's specifically condemned in the Sermon on the Mount and because it is so strong that it overrides reason.

Yesterday, I questioned that ideal. Specifically, I asked myself if I would be willing to sacrifice the control I've cultivated for more than half of my life if it meant deeper emotional experience.

I thought about it and discussed it with some close, trusted friends. I concluded two things: if there were something wrong with me emotionally because I've been controlling myself too tightly and if it were possible to remedy the situation by letting go, I ought to do so. My experience has been that when I've gravitated to one extreme, I have to release the fear of the other extreme in order to progress towards a proper balance between them. I also decided that I don't think there's anything wrong with my emotional state. I'm not hiding from my emotions and I'm not suppressing them; I just don't happen to have a strong emotional response to some things and that has surprised me but simply is the way it is.

This morning, I was flipping through Preach My Gospel as part of my daily scriptural study. I came across the section about hope in chapter 6. As I read, a strong feeling of peace came over me. I realized that I have learned hope. I live it. I believe that good things are coming. I believe that, no matter what happens, my life can be happy – and that other lives can be happy, too. I realized that when, as the saying goes, the Lord shuts a door, I don't stand there and look at it as darkness closes around me; I simply locate the best open door I can find and move towards it. I was grateful to be reminded that I can, in fact, feel emotion and more grateful for the divine approbation that this communication implied.

Now, dear readers, please excuse me. I have worlds to conquer.

A few thoughts from my first days in New York City

I live a couple of blocks from the Lincoln Tunnel, but haven't yet found the sea of swirly twirly gumdrops.

When I walked through Central Park, I remember thinking that there was no snow, so Buddy's skill with snowballs was moot.

I love the attitude that The Metropolitan Museum of Art has: this art is to be shared freely.

People come to the Met from all over the world. Trying to understand languages is even better than the artwork.

The bust of Caligula wasn't as great as everyone else seems to think.

I really like Monet.

Van Gogh really likes swirlies.

Rodin (who sculpted The Thinker) was one weird cookie.

People in NYC aren't hostile, as their reputation would indicate. They're just in a rush. They actually try to accommodate each other while making sure that they hustle from one place to another.

I don't really like Times Square, but I'll take it over the Strip anyday.

The blend of languages and cultures is amazing.

I love it when there's a train that goes almost directly to where I'm going because the subway is so fast.

Mormon culture shows up when Mormons (more properly, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) get together, no matter where they are.

I find myself observing more and talking less when I'm in new surroundings. It still wouldn't be fair to call me shy, but I haven't been as overwhelmingly talkative.

I haven't seen much weather yet, but it seems pretty temperate.

Lots of people smoke here.

It seems that no one cooks in midtown – ever. Fortunately, there are ways to order groceries online.

I've been good about getting up in the mornings, but it's boring when everyone you know is still asleep. The jet lag could be a lot worse.

I'm pleasantly surprised by how clean the air is here, despite the prevalence of smokers.

My apartment is really nice. And it has a washer/dryer!

You may say I'm a dreamer

I think the valedictorian at my high school had a GPA of over 4.5. I remember that I had friends who would avoid taking a class because it wasn't honors or AP and would bring down their GPA, even if they got an A. My approach was to take the hardest (and therefore most beneficial) classes that taught things I wanted to learn. Needless to say, I did not have a 4.5.

But when I went to college, my GPA was too low to even apply for the scholarship I wanted. I worked hard to get good grades. Towards the end of my undergraduate education, I started to realize that I'd made a huge mistake: I was trying to get good grades instead of trying to learn. I began focusing on internalizing the material instead of just succeeding. I learned more, enjoyed it more, and my grades were at least as good as before.

I'm glad I learned that lesson as early as I did but wish I'd learned it earlier. Since then, I've learned a lot about how I learn and about how others learn. I've also learned about how our educational systems could improve. This post describes the problems as I see them and my suggestions for how to improve them.

Read the whole story...

You keep saying that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

I'll start a summer internship in a month and a half across the country from where I live. Since it will take me so far away from the people I love, I've been thinking a lot about friendship in general and my friends in particular. I've been thinking about the times that I have entered a new setting (by moving or starting a new job, for example) and about the joys and sorrows this has brought to me. In this post, I'll endeavor to describe what friendship means to me. I hope that my friends who read this will have a deeper understanding of their significance in my life – something I try to communicate daily but something that I fear is not generally understood.

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When I grow up

I started writing a blog post about different fields of study and jobs that I've tried or thought about and how none of them has worked out. I realized that much of my introductory material is essentially the same as this post, which I wrote 16 months ago. There are, of course, some differences in what I would emphasize or how I'd phrase things, but it's mostly the same.

The bottom line is that I'm still not really into my research. I suppose it might be a little different if I were in another job. If I were on an assembly line, I could do good work even though I didn't think much of it. But as a researcher, I can't do high-quality work without being fully invested in it. So far, I haven't been fully invested and it's crippled my ability to perform.

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The attention span I never had

I was bored a lot as a kid. And I do mean a lot. It seemed like adults always just wanted me to be quiet and not bother them. It chafed, but I wasn't in much of a position to argue. As the fictional Valentine put it in Ender's Game, "They have a word for people our age. They call us children and they treat us like mice" (p. 127).

My mind works really fast. It always has. I'm sure this contributed to the interminable nature of each car ride, church meeting, class, or social gathering. I'm reminded of something Data tells Captain Picard: "0.68 seconds sir. For an android, that is nearly an eternity." (Star Trek: First Contact -  http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117731/quotes#qt0455868). Maybe all the other kids were just as bored as I was. I'm not sure. But having a quick mind definitely didn't help.

It may be surprising to some of my readers that school bored me. Read the whole story...

Why I call myself Petey

My family doesn't really do nicknames. I think that it comes from my family's very proper culture (especially by Californian standards) and from my parents' desire to remind us of our Biblical namesakes. I'd been called Pedro occasionally as I grew up, but it never really stuck. "Stevie Wonders" didn't long outlast my brief moment of 4^th-grade recess football glory. Everyone I knew called me Peter for my entire childhood.


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Behind blue eyes

Introduction

People look at me quizzically when I tell them that I had a nasty temper as a kid; if they've met me since junior high, they usually have a hard time imagining me being angry. The truth of the matter is that I did have a nasty temper when I was young and that I've changed dramatically in more recent years.

This post is very personal - I don't often talk about these things. But a conversation I had recently convinced me that my experiences might be beneficial to others. I hope that by writing this, I'll enable readers to help themselves or people they know to eradicate anger from their lives.

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